I love having new characters so much. I wish I wasn’t so freaking listless all the time the past few days or I would be drawing you guys tons of interactions of these guys. I also want to build on Chimera too. And I realized this means that I need to get competent and drawing horses OH BOY. I got a bit better at their heads during the summer, and I found one of my old figurines and a book on different breeds and anatomy from when I was a kid that should be helpful. I also need to look up how yurts pack up for transport. Nnnn.
Oh, and everyone being dressed in monotone for the Childrens’ Fable isn’t just for the kids. That’s the way the majority of civilians dress in the setting. Also, Anansi’s coat is specifically set up so that she can button it up and cover her colorful shirt and necklaces, because one of her skills is passing as a not terribly noticeable person while bluffing or gathering information. That’s also the reason why she doesn’t have any cool Ashanti face paint, though I might give her some little symbolic tattoos on her arms. They might just be drawn on with marker though. They’re just kids.
Also, in addition to bluffing, Anansi is a great storyteller (though sometimes Pan gets all stage hog-y) and tells a bed time story to everyone most nights.
The gameplay would be less about going from battle to battle and more often finding ways to sneak around. There would also be a lot of importance placed on resting each day and appreciating things that are beautiful. It would be cool if the player could choose to neglect to spend time on these, and therefore cause more mental instability among kids. There still would be confrontations though, especially as the kids leveled up. I’d love to have situations where Anansi is running along a rooftops, giving directions to everyone down in the alleys as how to best outwit their foes. I’d want to rely on cleverness and balance over just tanking through. I guess that kind of mentality comes from being someone with generalized anxiety disorder.
Because my sleepiness and appetite being all messed up, and I no longer have daily structure like working at CSMA, I’m ending up kinda all over the place and not shower and getting dressed until the afternoon and only eating one or two meals. (I’m also really trying to conserve funds right now) -sigh- Usually my energy level and appetite would regulate me somewhat, but they’ve been all messed up since spring, and additionally so since the surgery. That being said, everything is healing nicely and I’m still keeping my apartment clean, doing laundry, dishes, and stuff.
But my lack of art making means that I feel horribly unproductive. I think maybe I need to work on not tying my self worth to my art quite so much. I know it was the raft that kept me from committing suicide for so many years, but things have changed and I need to stop stressing about art and just enjoy it the way I do once I get in the middle of a piece. I love art and rationally understand that it’s okay if things go wrong, piece doesn’t turn out well, will never be perfect, or if I need to start over. Maybe I’m just emotionally fixated without realizing it, because for so long it was the only way I could convince myself that it was worth and it was worth it to suffer through another day of academic struggles, bullying, aching loneliness, and self-hatred. Maybe that’s what I need to teach myself. I should talk to my psychologist to see what he thinks.
Oh, I took one of my favorite t-shirts that had a tiny hole and I was going to have to throw out and turned it into a cover for my desk chair to make it more comfortable. I am thoroughly pleased so far and my re-pourposing of things that have holes and/or stains. It’s like I don’t really need to give them up.
If you’re super near-sighted like me and can’t remember where you left your glasses, because like an idiot you didn’t put them in the place you always do, see if you can’t find a digital camera or smart phone. You can then use this to easily search for your misplaced glasses, because you can hold the screen close enough that your eyes can focus properly. (Which for me is less than a foot away, because gosh darn is my eyesight bad.)
You need regular, good doses of it to keep you balanced and happy. But you also can’t sleep all day, or you’ll become sick. You need to get up and challenge yourself. So don’t feel guilty if you need to take some time in your comfort zone to get back your strength and stability, but make sure to venture out and go on adventures regularly.